Sonnet 43

Elizabeth Barrett Browning wrote 44 sonnets for her husband, the poet Robert Browning. Her father discouraged his children from marrying, so EBB kept their relationship a secret. In Lady Geraldine’s Courtship, she had mentioned Browning’s poem, Pomegranate. Browning then wrote to her telling her that he admired her poetry and that he loved her. They corresponded in secret and eloped and married in 1845. This poem expresses EBB’s love for Robert Browning.

Sonnet 43 by Elizabeth Barrett Browning

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the Ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love the purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints! – I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! – and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.

An Over-Analysis of Sonnet XLIII by Elizabeth Barrett Browning by Claire Wong

Line 1: How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
EBB wishes to express the ways she loves Robert Browning, how she loves him and he reasons she loves him. This is a rhetorical question. No one is expected to answer it, only herself.

Line 2: I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
She loves him to such a great extent that her love may be said to have a large volume; it occupies so much intensity. This line is expressive and dramatic. In another context, depth may indicate the depth and sincerity of her feelings; they are not shallow. This is only a mere speculation. The large depth, breadth and height symbolize the magnitude of her love. Height may indicate something elevated – perhaps she feels better and more spiritual by loving Robert.

Lines 3 and 4: My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the Ends of Being and ideal Grace.
When she is “feeling out of sight” or neglected her soul or emotions can attain or achieve “the Ends of Being and ideal Grace.” “Reach” is dramatic, as though she usually finds difficulty in this attainment. The word “ends” indicates something deep or hard to achieve. It is dramatic. Note that “Ends”,”Being,” and “Grace” begin with Capital letters. This hints at something important and abstract, like a quality or virtue or an important institution.
“Being” connotates EBB’s existence; she feels that she can exist, and that she has a right to exist due to Robert’s love. She wants to live for this love of theirs. Her loves makes her want to continue living; she now has a reason to live and be happy that she has a love. Possibly without love she felt dreary, especially since her brother’s death. His love inspires her to be more gracious and tolerant, perhaps “ideal Grace.” Perhaps the ideal Grace may indicate that love inspires her to be cultures and elegant so that she can be sufficiently worthy of Robert Browning (?) She can achieve something ideal and perfect.

Lines 5 & 6: I love thee to the level of everyday’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.

EBB loves Robert Browning to such an extent at all times, at day and night :”sun and candlelight.” When she is by herself, “most quiet need,” she need him. Possibly thinking of him abates her loneliness in silence, as her father was strict. She must think of him in her loneliness; he keeps her alive. Another possible interpretation of “quiet need” is that her passion for him is “quiet” or a kept secret, as her father would not allow her to marry. Or else her “need” for him is not merely wild passion, but pure and soothing; not a mere desire of the senses, but is, instead, a pure, true love, not mindless lust. EBB loves RB everyday and thinks of him in quietness by “sun” (day) and “candlelight (night) indicating that she loves him incessantly.

Line 7: I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
EBB loves RB with the intensity of men fighting for freedom. She compares her restricted situation to the anti-slavery movement going on which she was in favour of. This shows her political ideals. EBB’s father was an autocratic tyrant and prevented his children from marrying. He would disapprove of EBB’s love. Despite the barriers to their relationship, Elizabeth loves Robert “freely.” She feels free to love him; she will not be restricted from loving him. Her love is not coerced or forced. It is out of her own free will. She feels she has the right to love him, and she should be free to love. We should have the right to love. She discards the restrictions. This way she shows her will to defy authority.

Line 8: I love the purely, as they turn from Praise.
As the “men” fighting for “Right” are willing to face criticism and sacrifice goodwill, similarly her love for Robert is so pure that despite the fact that people like her father oppose her union, she is willing to face criticism. She will turn from goodwill. She is willing to sacrifice “Praise.” She loves Robert whole-heartedly. Another interpretation is that she loves him purely, not because she desires Praise from him. She does not expect praise in return. She just loves him.
{Or she wants an innocent love (“purely”) – by Dayang. This is highly speculative.}

Line 9 & 10: I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
EBB’s brother, Edward, had died, making her grieve immensely. The intensity of anguish and suffering she had experienced is put in her love. This is a replacement for pain as one can transfer the intensity of emotions. To overcome her grief, EBB loves Robert. She loves him with trust “childhood’s faith.” A child trusts its elders implicitly and blindly.


Lines 11-14: I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints! – I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! – and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.

I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints! –
EBB has lost her love and regard for the saints she once idolised. This shows her former religious ideals. Perhaps she used to be religious. Her love is thus a change and awakening from the naïve girl to a grown woman who can now think more logically. Saints may also connotate her protector, or father. Her “saints” are “lost” because instead of being a “saint” or kindly protector her tyrannical father suppresses her. She may have though t of him as a protector but now he is proved to be a tyrant. It may also mean that EBB loves Robert with the love she believes she now does not receive from her father as he is controlling her. Saints may also symbolize her dead brother and mother who are “lost” as they are evidently dead and supposedly in heaven. That makes them saints as Elizabeth had been fond of them. Her love for Robert may have replaced the love she once bore for her “lost saints.” A dash separated this phrase from the next phrase.

I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! –
EBB loves Robert so much with her life; he is a major part of her life, which is symbolized by “breath”. This is further substantiated by “of all my life!’ She loves him when she is happy (“smiles”) and when she is sad (“tears”) or incessantly. In another perspective, her love is so strong that it makes her breathless, smile and cry. It is the source of her happiness (because she loves and she is loved; he loneliness is abated) and grief (because her father would not permit their relationship). When we are in a state of strong emotion, we may feel breathless. The exclamation mark is dramatic, portraying the intensity of her love. Her love is very emotional.
A dash separates this statement from the next.

and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.
“And, if God choose,” suggest that their love should be endorsed by God. This shows her religious ideals. It may also mean that her continuous love is fated. If fate means it to be, EBB decides that she will love him. “I shall but love thee better after death” indicates that death will not put a stop to her love for him. She may love him better after death because he is then unattainable. We desire the unattainable. This has a tragic note, as though EBB is crying out. This is because her love is suppressed; should they never marry, she might die of a broken heart, but her love will persist. In another perspective, this may also mean that she decides that she will love Robert better after her brother’s death to fill her emotional void. It is time to get over her loss and his death (as she loved her brother) has made her love Robert as she needs an object of affection The love she bore for Edward is transferred to her love for Robert. “God” and “saints” are in contrast. Saints are associated with God, but they are “lost” as no one is there to protect her. God, on the other hand, may have fated them to be united (in EBB’S point of view. This is for atheists.)